Perfectly Delicious

“Willy Wonka, the amazing chocolatier!”

I have recently had an opportunity to fall in love with the eccentric confectionery inventor all over again. Chloe and I have been obsessing over Broadway shows and the one that has branded itself on my heart is Charlie and Chocolate Factory: A New Musical. Now I will fully admit I was looking into this show because I really like the actor who played Willy Wonka; Christian Borle. But that being said I have always been intrigued by the character since I read the Roald Dahl classic in third grade.

The many incarnations of Willy Wonka

Why doesn’t Willy Wonka get more love? He is almost the perfect man. I mean there are times when he is childish, a little rude, even slightly unhinged, but he has endured through time. There are many reasons to love Mr. Wonka and I am going to talk about a handful of them.

Willy Wonka is the center of this incredibly tall-tale, and you can never quite know what is true and what isn’t. When thinking about the leading man archetype most people are ‘attracted’ to the tall, dark, and mysterious type. So how could Wonka not fit the bill? He and his factory are two for the “greatest mysteries in the chocolate making world.” In each version of the story is pretty much the same—spies infiltrated Wonka’s workforce and forced him to shut down, and after that couple years the smoke stacks begin billowing, and the lights reveal small shadows in the windows. But who is working the machines? Nobody really knows his story outside of the basics. It is stated:

“ Nobody ever goes in… and nobody ever goes out…”

We are never given a complete look at his thoughts, we just know that he has an agenda and he will not be questioned. Even as kids reap the consequences of the their actions we are not shown an ounce of true emotion… at least not until he is sure he can trust his audience. At every twist and turn he acts just slightly unhinged. In the book it comes out in the way he never answers a direct question. In the Wilder version it is in the way he stares and chants. The Depp version does a great job of showing his unhinged nature when he slips into flashbacks. And the Musical version plays up Wonka’s extra personality. What could be more mysterious than that?

When talking about Willy Wonka we have to talk about his candy. He has dedicated his life to the creation of the perfect confectionery. He strives to, and successfully, exceeds his own creativity with each new invention. He has created wondrous things such as ice cream that never melts, gobstoppers that can last up to an entire year, even gum that never loses its flavor. He is always trying to out do his general genius.

Borle’s Wonka is showing off his biosphere of Imagination.

What woman would be disappointed in someone that had an artistic flare? He created a whole room out of candy. The mint grass actually grew, the daffodils were butterscotch cup and saucers, and he mixes his chocolate by waterfall. The beauty of the Chocolate Room alone is enough to cause my knees to go weak. Can you imagine a picnic in there? I wouldn’t even want to eat it just enjoy the incredible surroundings, and his presence. To me the Chocolate Room is the equivalent of the Library that Beast gives Belle.

He dedicates time and energy into each and every one of his creations. Imagine what he could create when love enters the equation as well. Can you imagine a Wonka Valentine’s Day? I would love to see what he could create if he had a specific person in mind… specifically me.

Now if there is anyone else like me then you may be attracted to a healthy dose of Sarcasm. Willy Wonka is a troll, and personally, I love him for it!

He is not afraid to punish stupidity with a witty comment. So many times his humor is cleverly disguised under the overt personalities of those around him. In the book his comes off as childish, he skips and dances whenever he gets excited. In the two movies his sarcasm pours out of him as he interacts with each kid and their parent. In the musical he playfully changes his voice to fit the situation or create an atmosphere. No matter what version of him I would be getting, as long as he can make me smile, I would be happily his.

The whole reason that there is a golden ticket competition is because Wonka “can’t go on running the factory forever.” He needs someone to take over the factory and in turn take care of everything he loves. Besides just loving what he does and how he does it, he has a factory full of Oompa-Loompas that have loyally devoted themselves to him. He saved this ancient tribe from “horrifying, verminous hornswogglers and wicked whangdoodles,” brought them to his factory and supplied them with as much “cacao beans” as they wanted. He is even respectful and proud of his sorting squirrels. In the Musical we are introduced to one of them that he calls Jeremy. It is a fun moment because you get to see Wonka interact with something, or someone he cares about.

Wonka is loyal to those that have proven to be loyal to him… including, in some versions, his treatment of Grandpa Joe who had once worked for him. If he were to be in love, you can expect him to do whatever he needed to make sure that you were safe and happy.

Lastly, who would turn down a multi-BILLIONAIRE!?! Wonka has built himself an empire and there are very few that would ever be able to match his level of creativity or even his prolific energy. He was smart to find someone so perfect to take over when he needed to move on, but he still deserves a little happiness… even if he is “an old, old man.”

These are just a couple of reasons that I would love to be Mrs. Willy Wonka. Even if it is only in my dreams. He never pretends to be someone he isn’t, and he can make me smile. I realize that he is not for everyone, but then again that just means I get him all to myself.

Peace out Lover,

Until next time…