The Princess Defense

What is so wrong with being a Princess? Seriously? 

I know it has something to do with the fact that most fairytales are about Princesses that need rescuing. Today, to require help is to be “weak” and “vulnerable.” But we have overcompensated by allowing the thought that a “strong independent” woman can take on the world without any support. I feel like the world has now made the most basic desire of a little girl to be a toxic idea. 

Please, I am not trying to deny that women are strong. I definitely do not condone a woman playing the victim, either. I am one of those women who know how to handle my own problems, but I don’t WANT to do it alone.

I am noticing that there only being two options for “Princess,” and both are slightly toxic. You have the “Damsel” and the “Warrior.” They are opposite ends of the spectrum but are met with the same amount of judgment. 

I have observed that the “Damsel” cannot save herself and is too prissy to be of any use. To me, this is when a woman plays the victim. Now I need to preface this because I know there are legitimate times when we are victims. These are not to be taken lightly! My problem is when a woman gets herself into a situation and refuses to own that she is the one that made these decisions. 

Suppose you know that you tend to fall for a bad boy. Yet, you continue to knowingly allow yourself in situations where you get hurt or taken advantage of. In that case, you are the only one you can blame for sitting where you are. The other situation I loathe is when a woman pushes and manipulates those around her, especially her man. The moment she gets caught red-handed, she turns on the waterworks, and suddenly it is everyone else’s fault. Now there are the minor annoyances of entitlement. Still, those can be nipped in the bud with the right type of man and don’t necessarily need to become dealbreakers. 

The “Warrior” is the one that I struggle with. I love telling people, “I am a strong, independent Princess who can slay her own dragons.” But it is somewhat intimidating and lonely. You also tend to hurt those around you by alienating them when you do not allow them to be a part of your journey. On this end of the spectrum, we are relying wholly on our own strength. It is more mentally devastating when defeat must be conceded.

What happens when the “Warrior” princess comes to an obstacle that she can not defeat? She has no one around her because she has either pushed her loved ones away because she didn’t need them or trampled them on her way to victory. There is a reason the phrase “it is lonely at the top” exists in our world. 

I believe there has to be some middle ground, and I am working towards… the “Godly” Princess. This princess understands that her worth comes from the God that made her, and her strength is forged by leaning on him in times of trouble. This princess is made to steward the “kingdom” that God has given her, caring for the people and things he has brought into her life to love and cherish. 

A “Godly” princess garners hope and support from those around her, letting them pour into her life so that she can pour back into them and the others that need her strength and love. God’s Kingdom is a community; we are commanded to love one another, and we are to be unified as the church. Jesus was never alone in his battle against sin. He brought along disciples to teach and encourage. And when he comes back to win the ultimate war again sin and the Devil, he will be accompanied by legions of angels. 

A “Godly” princess recognizes she was never meant to be alone. Humans were made to be in a relationship with God and fellowship with each other. And man and woman were created to support each other. Genesis 2:18 “He knew it was not good for man to be alone….” Even the Proverbs 31 woman had a husband and were a partnership.

My whole life, I have leaned into the nickname “Princess,” and it is a title that I have learned to wear with dignity. I am a daughter of the King of Kings, and it is a role I do not take lightly. God has trusted me with a task: Protect and love those he has put in my life. It is not a task I can do on my own, so I will continue to trust and lean on those that He has brought to come alongside. We need to be raising up solid and gracious Princesses. They need to be taught that there is a lot of work and training that goes into the job, but it is a job that God will lift us into as we grow. 

I am a daughter of the King of Kings, and I hope his other Princesses and Princes, are happy to stand alongside me.

Until Next Time,
Peace Out Lovers!